Do you realize blaming has no value, nor will it solve any of your problems? Instead you must focus on making yourself better instead of blaming to feel superior or give yourself an out or escape clause. When you blame, others are seen as less making you the blamer “perfect”. You must realize your own flaws before you can identify the faults of others.
When you blame yourself, you often feel you should have done something differently or that there is something wrong with you, but this doesn’t help rectify a bad financial decision, quitting a job when you really need the income, spending money on a want and not being able to pay for a need or just mishandling your finances, which in turn cause stress and unfortunate situations. The fact remains, blame doesn’t correct or make it better.
Why even exert energy on something that can’t be changed? Instead of focussing on what has happened already you must be able to learn from your mistakes and move forward to focus on what is possible. Many of you have been miseducated or ill informed therefore have made bad financial decisions that leave us in desperate situations that tend to compound and fester if not addressed.
For so long I was telling myself that I was unlucky, I don’t have enough education, I should have stayed in school, I should have listened more. If you are blaming yourself for things that others have done to you to cause your situation you lose focus of the goal at hand. At the end of the day you must eliminate blame and determine if it will help you reach your goals or keep you stalled with a false sense of security.
Failure is a part of life, and feeling depressed when you are not able to achieve something is quite normal. However, if you continue to brood over your failure, point fingers or dwell on it for a long time, you may lose your self confidence and start thinking you cannot do anything worthwhile.
Here are a few tips to help you stop playing the Blame Game
1. Stop Saying What You Should Do
Many of us pressure ourselves to do things we aren’t able to do right now, but feel or know we should be doing. “I should pay that bill.” “I should call about that job.” “I should do more in my day.” We end up shoulding all over ourselves. Instead of saying “should,” start saying “could.” “I could” is more empowering and freeing. It gives you permission to feel more peach in the present.
2. Step Away from the Situation
Every situation we experience is part of a bigger plan. When you can look at financial setbacks and opportunities for growth, life becomes easier and there is less pressure. Look at the blessing in each lesson. Instead of blaming yourself or someone else for a situation, look for the silver lining. Ask yourself: what could I learn from this situation?
3. Trust Yourself
We often blame ourselves and others after the fact, usually because of regret or denial. This happens because we don’t trust ourselves. We make financial choices for the wrong reasons. But when you learn to trust yourself, you will have more confidence. This eliminates self-doubt. You will be aligned with your true self and your desires. That naturally helps you remove blame.
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