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Who gets married to get a divorce? NO ONE!! A surely no one expects an affair to destroy their marriage. But what do you do to move on if this happens to your marriage? You may feel pressure from family, your church, society or even your spouse to stay in the marriage. The reality is, only you know if staying in the marriage is a possibility. The good news is, there are ways to ease the pain and make this a healthy growth process.

1. Forgive. Realize that forgiveness is really more for your benefit than for the other person’s. As the famous saying goes: “Holding onto anger is like drinking the poison and expecting the other to die.” I speak over you, You shall not die but live through this… say it…again and again…

2. Trust the process. Keep going. Every step, no matter how small, is moving you forward. It may not always seem that way, but you’re making positive progress toward a healthier future.

3. Give yourself permission to feel every blunt of the pain. If you live in a fantasy about the way you feel, the healing process takes longer…

4. Accept you, your feelings, your flaws and all, accept you and love you for who you are…. Accept yourself completely — all that you are, and all that you are not. Spend time alone joyfully by journaling, reading, and meditating. Now is the time to do that one thing you always meant to do but kept putting it off. You have the power to create a life of your own making. Be proactive and take full responsibility for your happiness.

5. Accept that the marriage has changed drastically and you have to decided whether or not its over. You can no longer invest emotionally in what was, but you have to accept what is new now…. The more you hold onto the past, the more you will recreate it in your present moment and in the future.

6. Accept the fact that uncertainty is normal. face and overcome your fears by taking a close look at what the anxiety really is….and face that fear head on…

7. Fall in LOVE with you again.—I believe in RADICAL Self Care…Do all the things that make happy, stay around the people that make you happy, and take care of yourself, mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, and financially…Never Forget that YOU are the apple of God’s Eye….infidelity

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